Flight of the Hummingbird - Day 105 – 7-20-2021

To never go there again, what is that keeps me going?

Learning the lessons of the past and the present moment,

I don’t know what is going on and I’m sitting with it,

Nothing is changing in the moment, so bear with me,

But yes it is, every moment is changing,

It is painful and I just know there is relief from the pressure on the other side, maybe not right this second, but it is there,

It releases all the time, although the pressure stays until it is time,

I can do this, it’s not easy, but I know I need to walk through this for my Soul’s growth,

I am ok,

I am not ok,

I am exhausted and building back up,

Is this what is meant by midlife crisis?

I never believed in that from a societal view,

Never having an intention of losing my mind,

Maybe losing the mind is a good thing,

Things go away and things are changing,

New levels of understanding are taking over from constant thoughts,

Working through the madness,

Clearing out what no longer serves,

Literally with things and my mind,

In the moment, this ride is overwhelming,

Sitting with myself and healing through it as I continue to get rid of things I have accumulated in my life that I know longer need or care about,

They are just dust magnets, and I really don’t like dusting, so why not get rid of it?

Realizing the beauty of relationship, I recognize the importance of love,

For self and for my children, and then for others, more and more,

I love… me.

I love me so much that I am taking care of me to walk through these changes,

No, I cannot ever say it is easy, it sucks,

I can say that every time I walk through something that doesn’t kill me, it does make me stronger and more loving toward myself,

I am the most important person in my life because without me, there is no loving relationship with any other,

It has been difficult to realize this for myself, but I am seeing it now from recent life experiences,

Lessons learned, new beginnings, moving through,

I’ve got this, so how does it get any better than this?

Recreate My Life