Flight Chronicles of the Hummingbird - Day 24 – 4-30-2021 - The Truth

The Truth

Some days, the Universe has a way of setting up opportunities or life experiences for us to learn something about ourselves.

I had a couple of really powerful energies cross my path in the last 18 hours. The first being a lesson in communication and truth yesterday with my former partner.

We both walked right into that one and I am happy that I reached out to him to complete the discussion we were having so we (or at least I) could understand what was going on. He had come out and said something to me that I felt hurt by and I couldn’t fully understand what happened. Nor could I let it go because as usual, I wanted to get to the bottom of it for myself and my healing.

I reached out to him and we ended up getting back on a Zoom call and I told him what was happening.

I won’t go into the details, but we went back and forth for a while until finally the truth came out for both of us.

The discussion was about Mother’s Day weekend, specifically, the lesson was obviously bigger.

We made plans for a short visit. This is the house I lived in for the past year and a half. I wanted to go through my boxes in the garage and clear out things that no longer feed my soul, mean something to me or are useful in preparation to move the stuff.

When we began to discuss it, though, fears came up in both of us.

The bottom line is that we weren’t being truthful with ourselves or each other. This is a challenge because there are times when we (none of us) recognize our own truth to be able to accept how we are feeling. Then we are unable to share that truth with someone else.

What it felt like to me is there will be some sort of retribution and punishment for speaking my truth.

My fear is once again being alone on Mother’s Day. This has been consistent since my children were little before the alienation began when my son was 9 and my daughter was 5. I have had maybe two Mother’s Days with my son in person since that time and none with my daughter.

There were other things that were coming up for me that I needed to walk through.

Since I can’t speak for him or his experience, I can say what it felt like on my end. I was feeling hurt because of the non-communication of what was really going on under the surface on both sides. His truth was not being told to me because of whatever his fears were and that is where we ran into trouble in communication. Certainly my truth wasn’t being told because of my fears.

In being afraid to let someone know what is going on, what our truth is, we don’t give the other person a chance to rectify their feelings or behaviors. And at the same time, we are responsible to tell our truth for ourselves.

For me, when I’m not speaking my truth, another version of the truth comes to the surface and I will tend to teach or control to protect myself.

This behavior, in no way, shows the truth about who I really am; there are literally layers of trauma and fear that need to be let go of.

Now… the other energy that crossed my path, literally; a Palmetto Bug.

Ewww, I’m not crazy about these yet there was something different about this one. It was sitting by the door to the room I’m staying in just off to the right so I wouldn’t accidentally step on it. It just sat there. Usually, they quickly scurry off and I have to chase them to get them out.

As I scooted it out of my room, down the hall and out the front door, it let me do it. I knew, because of this not so normal behavior from my experience with them, that it had something to say to me. I haven’t had this happen with me in a while where a totem would cross my path, so I knew this was big.

It fit right in with what is going on now and what I need to know at this point:

Palmetto Bug Lessons – durability, adaptability, go with the flow. Pay attention to subtle energies which are about to change, big time. Be prepared to shift into a different state of awareness suddenly and be adaptable when it happens. Flex with the flow of my environment and grow where I am planted. Sometimes the lesson is to clear out the old and clarify the energy in my living environment. Most importantly, their lesson of being adaptive when the environment is hostile is one of the most powerful wisdoms they can impart. He made me stronger by crossing my path.

Awareness and acceptance are key. As I said, there is a truth and a light inside us. Our journey is to release the old, outmoded beliefs and painful feelings from the past that no longer serve us. We get to let the light penetrate that which we are; beautiful beings with plenty of love (what most of us want to give and receive anyway) to share with the world.

My journey is to be the change I wish to see in the world.