Flight Chronicles of the Hummingbird - Day 31 – 5-7-2021 - Grief and Awe

Grief and Awe

I know that is a strange title to give this, however, what is going on inside of me and in my life right now is completely shocking to me. Then again, it really isn’t. It is more about awe.

The things that are going on are all about the things I have been researching and healing from for years. Starting with the film The Secret back in 2006, when things really began to shift in my life. This was right in the middle of the situation with my children, and it really turned my thinking upside down about the way life really is.

There are things that happen and are with us in everyday life, deep inside us, that are unexplainable and most of the time, unbelievable. That is what I kept thinking until this week.

What is happening now is that I see, really see, is that as I change my thoughts, words, behaviors and release the old stuck feelings and beliefs, that what they say about manifesting and life, comes to me as I can handle it. The manifestations are coming all at once, I wouldn’t know how to handle them right now, but they are coming.

If we believe that we are not good enough, then when good things happen, we won’t believe it and we go right back to our set point of not good enough. It is a vicious circle we go through as we live this life.

Here’s how I’ve been walking through this. The healing and relief comes through grief. When I felt angry, I grieved. When I felt weepy, I grieved. There have been a lot of things that have come up for me to grieve.

There are so many things that cause grief (I’ve heard around 40), not just from a physical death of a loved one. I have been in grief for the loss of my children, myself, from divorce, from moving and leaving people, from people leaving me, etc. for as long as I can remember.

I found out a couple of days ago that grief can also stem from a change in pattern. This is where I am today. All of the things I have known in my life have shifted as I move into this new venture.

In the past few years, I have allowed myself  to fully grieve everything that happened to me in my life. I also learned what to look for that was coming up as grief and learned how to really grieve.

Grief brings up the deepest, lost and most buried parts of us. It sits with us if we aren’t afraid to sit with it. It loves us and when we ask what to do, it loves us even more because it tells us that we don’t have to do anything. Just to sit with it and allow the feelings to surface in order to release them.

The deeper we love, the more we get to grieve. The following is a quote from a friend, “Without love, there is no grief (and I will add, without grief, there is no love). Grief is a beautiful sadness.”

It is so important for me to grieve and connect with others and show them how powerful it is for our healing. That is my goal.

We are all going through grief, whether we know it or not, from all of the events over the past year and a half. It’s ok to grieve, it’s ok to get support and it’s ok to heal. When we grieve, it doesn’t necessarily go away, it allows us to carry it, for grief is who we are as humans in this life together.

Nothing stays the same, everything changes. We need grief to walk through that or we and our lives get stuck. We feel depressed, anxious, scared, lost, etc. unless we recognize what grief can do for us.

Take time today on your journey and sit with these thoughts for a bit and see if there is anything you need to grieve. It will hurt as you go through it, I will guarantee that, but there is a lightness you will feel on the other side when you allow yourself. It takes some time to understand how it works, but it’s worth it. Give yourself permission and clear the way for grief to do it’s work. Sending love…